One of my biggest fears in early eating disorder recovery was: Who am I without my eating disorder? My eating disorder had become my identity over the many years that the eating disorder was a part of my life. The eating disorder was the thing that directed my actions and behaviors. It had invaded my […]
It is Easter—my very favorite day of the year! Why? Yes, it ushers in spring, it points to warmer days of being outdoors, and my favorite jelly beans abound in the stores. However, Easter is my favorite day of the year because it celebrates the reason for the hope and joy I have in my […]
At times I wonder why things that happened to me a very long time ago still can usher in a gnawing hurt in my heart. Have I not worked hard in recovery to gain an understanding of pain from my past? I know I have. I like to think of my relationship with my past […]
We Can Not Do This Alone Living the years in my recovery journey I am convinced that one of the greatest predictors of living in freedom from an eating disorder is the support we surround ourselves with. The journey is difficult. It is so hard. The people we have by our side to walk with […]
I recently found myself standing in front of the mirror in a store’s dressing room while trying on swimsuits. Yikes! This can be a distressing situation for anyone, but as someone in recovery from an eating disorder, I found myself suddenly bombarded by negative messages and feelings of fear and shame. Self-judgment filled my head as […]
This has been an important week bringing awareness to the community of the devastation of eating disorders. I had the opportunity as a member of the Recovery Ambassador Council for Eating Recovery Center (ERC) to take part in a fantastic event in Cincinnati, OH, earlier this week. Maria Bruce, a senior at Mount St. Joseph […]
“Do I want to get “better” or do I want to become truly “well”? Kelli, what’s it going to be?” That’s the question I asked myself on a cold, snowy day several years ago. I was a 42-year-old woman in an eating disorder treatment center. This wasn’t my first time being hospitalized or my first […]
How many times in early recovery did I wrestle with this word, TRUST? The eating disorder had whispered for so many years that it was to be trusted to have the answers to my shame and fear. In direct opposition to that voice, my treatment team of physicians, therapists, and dietitians asked me to trust […]
Making the decision to enter treatment for an eating disorder at any age can be difficult, producing so much fear, anxiety, and shame. No matter how old you are, you can find many reasons to believe that eating disorder treatment just is not a good idea. I know the feelings that surround the decision to seek treatment […]
I absolutely love this word! Google the definition of the word, “redeem” and this is some of what you will find: retrieve, regain, recover, get back, reclaim, and buy back. A biblical view of this word says all of that and more. God is in the business of redeeming, restoring and giving life. The entirety […]